A New Year

So, I know that we are already two weeks into the new year, but I consider that still pretty new.  I'm not big on New Year's resolutions.  Not because I don't keep them, which, like most people, I probably don't do a very good job at.  But because I am a goal-setter all year long, and I don't particularly mark my life by the passing of each calendar year.  Growing up, time passed by school years, and now time seems to be marked by life events, not the calendar.

That being said, 2013 was a pretty amazing year, and one that I will never forget the importance of...  I remember thinking on January 1, 2013, "This is the year we are going to have our baby!"  It was a fact that I had no idea how to truly understand, and now that Marie is so entwined in our lives and hearts that I can barely remember life without her, it's interesting to reflect on that anticipation.  And what is even more interesting is that we don't know what 2014 will bring.  We might very well have a new baby in 2014, but from this vantage point, looking out over the whole year before us (I like to think of it as if I am standing on a mountain with valleys and fields rolling out before me...the new year that is waiting to be explored and lived...), we do not know if this is "the year we are going to have our baby" again.  I find that exhilarating.  The thrill of trusting in God...

It goes without saying that this past year was incredible.  I have simply never learned so much, grown so deeply or loved so completely as I did in 2013.  And I have never been so grateful to God for the gifts in my life.  My incredible, selfless, hard working, loving husband.  My perfect little girl.  My beyond-generous parents.  My wonderful siblings who I continue to get to know in new ways.  My loving and generous in-laws and sibling-in-laws.  And all of the wonderful nieces and nephews.  Not to mention some truly lovely new friends, some blessed old friends, a wonderful church and community and the millions of experiences, adventures and other gifts sprinkled throughout the days.  I am so blessed, and when I look back on a year like this--or any year, for that matter--I cannot feel anything but unworthy, and blessed beyond measure and grateful.  So grateful.

And that brings me to my goal for this year... Keep my eyes open to those blessings all around me.  Do not fail to see them because of the muck and clutter that also comes with daily life.  Do not forget my unworthiness.  Do not forget to be grateful.  Remember that it is all, all, a gift.

So here's to exploring those rolling hills and fields, and to always keeping our eyes raised in gratitude.  Every year will not be like this last one, but my heart must always stay as grateful.  Happy New Year!